israeli politics

trauma and post - 6.29.24

Almost impossible to believe, but after an hour of sharing how much we are traumatized, we managed to ignore the present situation and turn our minds to trips we took long ago.  It’s still trauma, but it may be moving into some place better.  We didn’t even mention Gaza once.

A few days ago there was an article about how we don’t seem to be sympathetic to the plight of the Gazan population.  I don’t know if I mentioned it here, but not a day goes by without discussion about what we can do for the Gazan people.  I’ve seen my friends up north abandoned by our leaders while they wander about the country and sometimes around the world for 9 months. I’ve watched the way the aid trucks have been hijacked by Hamas and their contents sold on the market and wondered how we’d be able to get past the people in charge and get our lives back.  We think we have many things in common. 

sorry if this doesn’t make sense.  i don’t reread or fix and I’m tired of trying to live a normal life.

 

trauma and post – Read Post »

israeli politics

in my genes - 6.27.24

After years of bureaucracy and failed escapes, my parents managed to get out of Danzig on the last bus.  As they left, Hitler’s troops invaded.  So I was only born because they knew when to get out. 

My kids are considering leaving for the war – afer all, what good could they do since they can’t fight?  But so far, they remain.  

And so do we.

Why? Why can’t I even take a summer house in Switzerland? Friends who were evacuated from the north are living in hotels and being pressured to go stay with their relatives in America, but they stay in those cruddy hotels without even the comforts of home and they won’t leave.   They listen to the news to hear if it is their house that has been bombed today, and they try not to kvetch.

So maybe we’ve got more of the Massada genes than the Holocaust experience.  Maybe we’re deceived by the false appearance of some kind of normality… I mean personally I still have a pretty good life, even if it means dusting off the chairs in the shelter.  But now that I think about it, I’m not sure I brought enough water for everyone, and I really should upgrade the first aid kit…

in my genes – 6.27.24 Read Post »

israeli politics

It’s been hard to write lately. As you know I never correct what I write, and I write spontaneously with no censorship.  But in the past few weeks I just don’t know where to begin.  I can’t begin to list the government’s crimes I’ve always suspected that are now coming to light, I can’t begin to list the crimes against us (Israel, Jews, Humanity) that are not acknowledged – not in the press, not on the media, not online.  I can’t begin to list the range of emotions we go through every day.  Here’s an example:  we met Meira for lunch today on the beach – the food was amazing, the sea was gorgeous, and the beer was divine.  We avoided mentioning the fact that there is a good chance we will be annihilated in the near future.  We avoided talking about the fact that 81 kibbutzim and towns in the north have been vacated because of the incessant bombing.  We said nothing about the fact that we cleaned our air raid shelter today and are ready to occupy it at a moment’s notice.  The announcements that the lifeguards are off duty came over the speaker in Arabic, Hebrew, English and Russian.  We kept talking about birthdays and grandchildren.  I guess the title i wrote before i wrote this piece doesn’t really fit.  But I never really know what I’m going to say until I say it.

Stiff Upper Lip - 6.26.24

stiff upper lip – 6.26.24 Read Post »

israeli politics

responses to rape =6.25.24

one thing you learn after you’ve been raped is that to tell about it diminishes you. Perhaps you won’t be believed, or you were asking for it, or it happened because you deservedit.  better not to say anything.  and what happens if you tell, and someone else likes the idea and thinks to try it on some french girl who was passing as normal.  shedeserves the same treatment, right?

responses to rape -6.25 Read Post »

israeli politics

lebanon is higher than us - 6.24.24

So is Syria. Of course you know that.  And you also know that’s an advantage in physical conflict.  They drop stuff on us and we have to shoot up.  They look down and with a little help they can see a family sneaking into their house in the middle of the night – maybe to pick up their passports left behind nine months ago.  And they can bomb the daylights out of them.  Thats what happened the night before.  Two guys from the civilian patrol came with the parents to cover them and they got shot, and the house is shot as well.  

I was talking to some friends on zoom last night and they didn’t know this kind of stuff at all.  All they know is that we’re starving kids in Gaza, and it makes them feel bad.  They don’t even know that the amount of food we’ve sent in is enough to cover all the hunger in Gaza.

We, on the other hand, who are paying for this food that only gets to the guys who are trying to kill us, are paying much more for our own food.  And nobody is complaining.

Well, we are complaining, but we always complain.  Now we tend to complain a little less, and are satisfied with a little less.

The people complaining who aren’t getting much attention are the Lebanese.  They are the ones who are getting bombed by us because we’re going after the Hizballah.  Rats.  I’ve known Lebanese who have so much in common with us and I’d love to drive up to Beirut for a luxurious weekend.  I remember my in-laws scooted up to Damascus for a little getaway.  Honeymoon in Cairo. 

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israeli politics

Woman at War - 6.23.24

We were about to start rehearsals when she got called up.  A really sweet girl, I couldn’t imagine she’d be in a fighting unit.  I hadn’t imagined she’s a sniper.  

My grandsons will be going into the army in a very few years.  

The fact that our young people are fighting for us, when it should be we old people are protecting them, is unthinkable.  We were supposed to make a better world for them.  I watched my grandson’s birth and imagined him a teenager….but not a soldier.  I think of my slender granddaughtera  – singer, dancer,  gymnast….

This isn’t right!

woman at war – 6.23.24 Read Post »

israeli politics

phoenix - 6.22.24

David Grossman said it tonight – if we don’t rise from the ashes now, we’ll never rise up.  This is such a crucial moment in our history.  

In a zoom workshop tonight I couldn’t concentrate – I kept wanting to be at the demonstration, at the 20th birthday party of  Naama Levy, a hostage in Gaza.  I didn’t go because I’m feeling very vulnerable physically, and I’m afraid of the violence.  But there is nothing else we can do to change this situation. 

I am even beginning to believe the rumors that Bibi is acting so unpredictably because he’s made a deal with Trump to make Biden look bad.  

pho Read Post »

israeli politics

Lost Men - 6.20.24

A dear friend told me today about a man she had seen many times in the neighborhood and had secretly longed for.  He was killed in the war – she told me – and only later she discovered his age, the story of his life, his hobbies, his ex-partner, his loneliness.

And she started to cry.

Every time they start to talk on tv about a man killed in the war I change the channel.  I cannot bear the loss.  Each one makes me think of their lives, their loves, their children, and I break up.  

When I see pictures of victims in Gaza it is more blurry.  It doesn’t always come automatically – sometimes I have to conjure up their individuality.   

And that too breaks my heart.  

 

Lost Men – 6.20.24 Read Post »