israeli politics

It’s not like Memorial Day in the States or other places I know.  The losses are immediate and real.  Soldiers, victims of terrorism, mourners – most people around here have one sort of pdsd or another.

As for soldiers, there is no doubt that we have a terrible “sacrifice of isaac” syndrome, that we send our sons to protect us. We endanger them to save ourselves.  Sons, lovers, fathers – all all lost.

As for PTSD – a guy who kept claiming he needed help for his PDSD set himself on fire in the offices yesterday.  Beyond desperate for help, it was the only way he could get attention, because we really don’t like to acknowledge this “weakness” of ours.  But I imagine seeing your seven best friends being blown up in the jeep in front of your jeep might have a lasting affect, don’t you?  

They managed to save the guy, for now.  

 

 

 

And it happens that this year our terrible memorial day falls on the eve of Ramadan.   

  

april 13, 2021 – the eve of remembrance day Read Post »

israeli politics

After a year of doing nothing, we’re going to take a holiday.  

If I look back and read what has happened this year, it’s probably a lot.  But it feels like nothing has been accomplished except survival.  And I don’t allow myself to read my diary, because it will make me even more self-conscious.

And I’ll be embarrassed that I write so much about my life and not about politics and change in the country.  I’ll be ashamed I have done nothing to improve even the small section of the world I inhabit.

 

So 

 

 

 

april 12, 2021 – holiday Read Post »

israeli politics

Old clothes – I have a closet full of old clothes, some only a year old – some from forty years back – all very foreign, like life before.  i keep trying to take things out and throw them out, but then I think – maybe we haven’t aged irrevocably.  Maybe we won’t be nuked by Iran, although  I am not totally sure of Joe’s wisdom. 

 

april 10, 2021 – Read Post »

israeli politics

See how filled with excitement the Safari was?

But as for my dialogue with the visitors from Nablus, our little conversation has ended – I sent the pictures to the guys and they said thanks and goodbye.  so I don’t think that I’ll be visiting them in Nablus any time soon.  

The last time I was in Nablus was over fifty years ago.     My ex did business there and we visited the manager frequently, even going up to the Mount of the Samaritans on Passover.  The secretary’s father was high priest there.  Her name was Iftikar, and I was sure we would be visiting frequently in the near future when we made peace. 

I was sure I’d be sitting in the beautiful courtyard in Nablus and showing Tel Aviv to the extremely sophisticated and pleasant people I’d met there, entertaining them in our little apartment.  But I never did anything to make that happen. 

april 10, 2021 – zoo and more Read Post »

israeli politics

So I’m sitting in the back of the cart we rented for our visit to the zoo, and the Safari is crowded with families all over.  The animals were all full of beans, courting each other all over, and everyone was having a great time

 

These kissing chimps are representative of what was going on.  The peacocks opened their glory to uninterested peahens and shuddered all over with desire. 

I kept thinking of Chaucer and his description of April with all the birds awake at night with hormones, and how it brings all the people out to go on pilgrimages.

“Whan that Aprille …”

Because it is Friday, most of the families were Arab, and I may have learned some names of animals from the lessons the mothers were giving to their children.

But then, sitting in the back of the cart we rented to let my bleeding big toe rest, I saw three young men walking as fast as Ezi was driving – smiling and seeming very happy and free.  I took up my camera, asked them silently for permission, and they joyfully agreed.  Not only did they agree, but they wanted copies – and caught up to ask me to send them.  After failing miserably, I passed the camera back to Ezi, who worked long and hard with the biggest narcissist to get them through while i asked the other two in Hebrew “Where are you guys from?”  because i couldn’t remember the Arabic.  They answered together “Nablus.”  “Walla!”  I answered. 

It turned out we have to become friends on Facebook to get the pictures through, and I think my new friend is a barber.  But I don’t know if we should stay friends.  Barbers have a special place in my heart.

 

april 9, 2021 – zoo Read Post »

israeli politics

There is a distinction I make between the public Holocaust memorial and the private Holocaust sense.  For me, I try to distance myself from the public.  I didn’t want to watch the ceremony and preferred a stupid series instead – especially since I feared the event would become political in some way.  And indeed it did – Our PM reminded us of his responsibility for the vaccination drive, I was told again and again in the news.

As the evening began, thoughts and memories came to me –  new recollections filled my mind.  Here’s one example:

absence
“What are you looking for?”
We’d ask Mother, as she rummaged
A cupboard or a drawer or the phone book.
“My lost youth,” she’d answer
Absent-mindedly, having forgotten
Whatever had occupied her mind
When she first began to search.
The bombs, the soldiers, the streets
Covered with bodies, the story of the children
Smashed against the wall, her babies
Washed down the drain in the bathtub in Danzig
They were always
Right there in the cupboard, the drawer,
The book next to the telephone.
 
This morning both Ezi and I stayed home to work on banal red tape – we stayed in our different rooms and didn’t discuss anything.  But when the siren sounded I stood in the doorway at attention and found myself looking into a mirror where I could see Ezi standing at attention as well.    We were, it seems, both in our private Holocaust thoughts.
 
 

 

 

 

april 8, 2021 – holocaust remembrance day Read Post »