We usually meet our friend every week at the beach.  We have a drink, go for a swim, have dinner, and have great conversations.   This week the swim was great and so was the conversation.   The dinner we ordered got lost for over an hour, we barely got compensated for it (free watermelon) and all I could think about was how stressed the waiter was and how unsuccessful the manager was.  In retrospect, I was focussing on the wrong things – I should have been paying more attention to what my friend was thinking beyond the conversation.  Now that I understood what she was worried about I can’t sleep.