since i don’t have a bunch of poet friends who dare be honest nowadays and give constructive advice in fear of hurting my delicate feelings, i am putting this draft here. i fear i haven’t worked out the comments thing yet, but i’m getting there. so write me if you have something to say about this:
Paralysis
A draft for Alicia
There’s so much I don’t want to remember,
so much I don’t want to see,
but imprisoned at home it comes to me
how paralyzed we all have been made
and how much we need to free ourselves
not just from the lockdown of our home,
but also the passivity imposed on us
not only by terror of the plague
not only by the empty shops,
the faceless people on the street,
the lies piled so high they have spilled
into every part of our lives.
When my father had his first stroke,
he had to teach half his body
how to move. I saw how much work
went into a single finger, then a hand,
until one day he was walking again.
The second time it didn’t work.
Getting a single word out
was too hard a task.
But I am his child
and my mother’s too.
And she moved for him,
refusing to let him relent.
I want to invoke her now
her stubborn blind will
that ignored the chill of reality
and forced movement forward.