Tel Aviv Diary - July 21, 2012 Karen Alkalay-Gut
July 21,2012 After Omer's magnificent birthday party we drove past the demonstration in memory of Moshe Silman. I hadn't known about the demonstration but the birthday party and the memorial demonstration suddenly connected in my mind. The whole point of a birthday party is to celebrate what was and what will be, and with good wishes we try to make the next year better, and of course that was the point of the demonstration, to make the next year better. It can't be any better now for Moshe Silman but it can be better for others.
July 22, 2012 "Why are you obsessing about this suicide?" Lisa asked me. "People kill themselves all the time!" Because this one is economically based and I have been there. I have been in the position of someone who has no money to feed his children and no one to ask for help. It was only for a short period - but I can understand the feeling of worthlessness and despair. And no one deserves to be in that position. July 24, 2012 That's it - I'm worn out and can't keep up. Didn't even go up to the ward with Ezi in the hospital until it was half over today. Spent the first half of the morning chatting in a cafe with a friend. When I showed up the nurses admonished me - but that was because they missed me...:) But when I saw the usual fish tank I woke up. Something had changed. they put in a blue center there: July 25, 2012 New computer. Despite partner's amazing efforts to make the transition seamless for me I'm not happy as yet. I need to feel the setting have made the computer an extension of my thoughts. that way i don't have to use my brain in the process. So Liz calls to tell me how surprised she is that someone objected to her saying this is a fascist state. "You see a different state than I see," I said. it's true. Each person here sees a different state -this is true even in the smallest distinctions - not just Arab and Jew. The new immigrant, the foreign worker, the people supported by social services, the people wise to the system (oh goodness I need a few hours to tell you about how the Eastern Block is reoorganizing PEN Israel and dancing circles around democracy as well as bureaucracy!) The terminology of fascism, democracy, bureaucracy is very very relative and changeable here. But the most important thing to remember is to see beyond the relativism of partial vision and limited perspective. July 26, 2012 Sometimes it hits me - an incredible love for Tel Aviv. Usually I'm focusing on the people I'm with - say in a cafe or on a walk. But sometimes I look around and people are strolling around, and there seems to be such a dynamic among all the creatures. The city teems with a kind of interactive life. of course all cities have some kind of interactive relationship among the inhabitants, but this city seems different to me. If I could spend my time enjoying the streets here I'd be thrilled.
